Health
October 14, 2019
link to facebook link to twitter
More Stories
Seven ways seniors can interact with pets Turn the page Five best pet types for seniors Prosthetic joints and dentistry When hard things happen Are you stressed out? The spirit of Alzheimer’s learning Part II Pets and seniors make the perfect pair Halloween pirate’s gold Fall risks are sometimes simple, yet fatal Is multi-generational living for you? Five ways our self-talk may be hurtful Natural disaster threats call for preparedness plan to protect seniors The spirit of Alzheimer’s learning  Winter sun safety: What to know about protecting yourself during colder months Tending to spiritual distress with aging and illness Blood pressure control a focus of American Heart month Home your own way March is colorectal cancer awareness month Safety at home for seniors Suicide - Are there answers? How to prevent bad breath War on opioids in California Help families make time for seniors during the holiday season Helping seniors with vision and hearing impairments Holiday stress-busters for harried caregivers It’s what’s inside that counts! Dental emergencies Don’t wait until it hurts! Does spring mean allergy season for you? Top 10 products to help seniors stay home How to take Tylenol safely The role companionship plays in aging 7 Tips to reduce the stress of incontinence caregiving Improving the state of aging in America Fight flu this season by getting immunized Confirm your preparedness plans for Seniors Did you get your flu shot? If not why not? A message from the heart Using anxiety to your advantage Youth, women and dementia The long-reaching impact of dementia Children’s dental health month Ten tips for healthy aging Planning for aging at home Thirty-four years as a dentist Tooth friendly Easter tips Feeding my hungry heart How to keep older adults cool during the heat of the day Invisible braces work wonders Senate passes Alzheimer’s and dementia research funding October’s most celebrated event Our Feelings Come From Our Beliefs Making sense of the season for seniors Cultures differ on what makes a beautiful smile! How to have a better year Falling in love is easy, but staying in love is very special A confession Women in dentistry Plan for where you want to age Three ways a senior can fund a home remodel Cannabis as medicine-Changing the face of aging May is skin cancer awareness month A brain is a reason to join the Alzheimer’s fight Recognizing and reporting elder abuse Dental technology- computers have changed our lives Create your personal Medicare account Understanding the aging brain Two ways to get your Medicare taken care of How to know if you are in danger of compression fractures Psychology Today The Art of Resilience: I Have I Am…I Can The advantage of dental implants Too much of a good thing for seniors and the holidays What families’ caregivers need to know about Recommendations for screen time Resolutions for your oral health Super Bowl, Joe Montana and blood pressure Open heart surgery – Thoughts from the other side Chewing gum - Helpful or harmful? Five tips for a healthy smile I will– I should– I can– I’ll try Rightsizing for seniors doesn’t have to be painful The Joy of Sadness Human Touch: The role companionship plays in aging at home Becoming who we really want to be How to fail well Back to school with healthy teeth Five ways to manage caregiver guilt Senior dating – Mom’s new relationship is heating up... Should you be concerned? Aspirin relieves mild pain Fighting osteoporosis and preventing fall-related injuries Un-retiring in a changing economy Coping with the unpredictable life of caregiving Double duty tools: toothbrush and floss Merry Christmas and Happy New Year Tips for living with low vision  Keep your Medicare costs down The freedom and choice to again place at home Put dementia on the agenda for 2019 Free app shows what Medicare covers The reason “Four” is the magic number? Preventing tooth decay in children Laughter is the best medicine Sports mouth guards-keeping teeth safe  Help your senior loved one avoid preventable hospitalizations Tips for keeping calm in the midst of crisis  Five cybersecurity tips for older adults Preparing kids for first dental visits Dental treatment concerns with patients taking blood thinners Home Health Care vs. In-Home Care: What you need to know Three ways to lessen negative thinking Amazing results with Arestin Navigating the aging journey Smoke and stress maintenance and recovery How to lower your surgery costs Know your pharmacist… Know your medicine as drug prices will jump in 2019 Influenza activity is increasing throughout California Show your kids’ teeth some love this Valentine’s Day! New life and stormy weather Your Medicare rights and protections Summer snacking and your child’s teeth Back to basics 10 summertime activities for seniors Three ways to boost your self-esteem Increasing West Nile Virus activity in Ca. Why are seniors targets for scams? Summer’s sun damages the skin Abscess gives warning 8 tips to minimize the behaviors of “Sundowning” Keeping your relationships fresh What are dental sealants? Healthy eating habits can benefit you and your teeth How does the body heal? Apply or renew Covered Ca. Health insurance by Jan. 15 Guilt from holiday eating Toothbrush tips Three reasons for a root canal Seniors: Say no to “free” genetic tests Yoga for relaxation & healing What causes sensitive teeth to hurt All of us make mistakes  Heat and older adults Five tips to cope with caregiver anger Back to school health Real decisions and moderation Three gifts you can give yourself Don’t stress, clench or grind! Gratitude and positivity can inspire caregiver self-care Medicare helps seniors use opioids safely Is it elder abuse or neglect? Dental scanning technology improves dental care Using Medicare when on foreign land Always being bright may not be so bright Trying to save a knocked out permanent tooth What happens to our teeth and gums as we age? Reduce wear and tear As Autumn begins, a reminder flu season can hit seniors hard Overcoming fears surrounding End-of-Life care Important: women and periodontal health Americans unaware of potentially life-threatening skin cancer Sun protection tips for young children Cannabis symposium Sept. 19th The importance of immunization Returning home is bittersweet Osteoporosis, osteonecrosis and dental health Living with Lupus Erythematosus How dentistry handles gastric reflux disease Use it or lose it- Muscle mass as you age  A free cheek swab test Twice a victim Finding a path forward after an accident Use it or lose it- Muscle mass as you age  If it is not broken, don’t fix it! Managing your mental health with or without insurance coverage Why gardening is the most recommended exercise for seniors

I slept in last Saturday!

By: Steven Campbell
August 2, 2019

I slept in last Saturday!

After all...Saturday is when we get to sleep in!

My phone shrilled at 10 a.m.! “This is the Healdsburg Senior Center. It’s 10 a.m.!  Where ARE you? There are 35 people waiting!”

Healdsburg is 30 minutes away!

The explosion of feelings in my heart was devastating; panic, fright, fear, self-loathing, guilt, shame and an inconceivable anger at myself.

“I’ll be there in 30 minutes!”

“I’ll see if I can get them to stay!”

As I scrambled getting dressed, Mary heard self-expletives she had never heard before.

I walked into their event room 27 minutes later, looking as if I had just run the Boston Marathon.

As I stumbled to the front of the room, a woman in the front row quietly articulated, “No one is perfect, Steve!” 

I got teary-eyed from what she had just declared.

I didn’t set up my laptop, my projector, my screen, or my PowerPoint.

I simply stood in front and began a presentation I had prepared for them on the subject, “Feelings - Where Do They Come From?

And then I spoke from my heart.

It was one of the best presentations I have ever given!

When I was done, many of them asked when I could return to speak to them again.

But as I was racing to Healdsburg that morning, my mind was filled with self-loathing.

And then I remembered the message I have been giving to thousands of audiences about feelings: that our feelings are NOT coming from what is happening to us, they are coming from what we are SAYING about what is happening to us.

So as I drove, and talked to the Lord a LOT, my mind eased a bit.

I cannot drive any faster…

I cannot change the time…

I cannot stop them from leaving before I got there.

But when I had arrived, that wonderful woman simply reiterated what all of us already know.

NONE of us is perfect!

For most of my life, my brain and I didn’t believe that!

In fact, we often didn’t even like each other!

And he was also my harshest critic.

But I was not alone. 

Studies are discovering that many of us are simply nasty to ourselves. It may be about our weight, or our physical appearance, or the incredibly stupid mistakes we have made. (Like lying in bed while 35 people were waiting for me to speak 30 miles away.)

We say or think awful things about ourselves – all in an attempt to make ourselves eat less and/or exercise more. You might call yourself lazy in an effort to make yourself be more active. Or you might tell yourself you’re a failure in the hope that it will make you try harder at whatever you’re failing at.

However,  the research of Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman discovered an ideal praise-to-criticism ratio – and although they focused on praise and criticism coming from others, it seems likely that the same numbers would hold true when they are coming FROM INSIDE OURSELVES.

According to their study of business teams published in the Harvard Business Review,  the factor that made the greatest difference in a team’s success rate was “the ratio of positive comments (“I agree with that,” for instance, or “That’s a terrific idea”) to negative comments (“I don’t agree with you” “We shouldn’t even consider doing that”) that the participants made to one another. (Negative comments, we should point out, could go as far as sarcastic or disparaging remarks.)

Six positive comments to one negative

The highest performing teams had an average ratio of almost six positive comments for every negative one, while the lowest performing teams had an average of one positive comment for every three negative ones. 

Interestingly, this outcome is remarkably similar to the results of John Gottman’s study of the likelihood of married couples getting divorced or staying together. 

And the winner is...

In Gottman’s work, the single biggest factor in a couple’s ability to remain married is the ratio of positive to negative comments the partners make to one another.

The optimal ratio is very similar to the one found in the Harvard study – five positive comments for every negative one. (The ratio for couples who ended up divorced was closer to one positive comment for every negative one.)

Now let’s return to the Healdsburg Senior Center.

That wonderful woman reminded me, “No one is perfect, Steve.” And yes…next time I will set my alarm a day ahead so this doesn’t happen again.

But I also had to remind myself, “Steve! You have been giving presentations for 30 years, and you can count the number where you were late on one hand.

So when I reached 42 and began teaching this stuff in colleges, my brain and I became the best of buddies. We have also learned (and yes, dear reader, it is something we can learn) to laugh at each other…especially when we mess up.

So now as I think of the Healdsburg Senior Center, my brain and I laugh together and then I feel very warm. In fact, when I want to feel good about myself, I now remember standing in front of those precious people and sharing my heart.

 

Wow!

 

Steven Campbell is the author of “Making Your Mind Magnificent.” His seminar “Taming Your Mind, Unleashing Your Life” is now available on line at stevenrcampbell.teachable.com.  For more information, call Steven Campbell at 707-480-5507.